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How COVID-19 Illuminates Opportunities to Create a Better ‘New Normal’

April 17, 2020 by Avi Kantor

The COVID-19 virus has changed our world. It’s brought out the best and worst in people and exposed many of our shortcomings as a culture and a global society. We were clearly unprepared. Hospital emergency rooms and healthcare workers are overwhelmed. Apparently, we have not created a healthcare system that can consistently respond well to such a crisis. Schools, businesses, state and local governments have had to shut down and go virtual. There’s been a global economic and financial contraction reminiscent of the Great Depression. Many people are unable to work, and earn a living. Some are concerned about the long term viability of their businesses or their employer’s business; they’re justifiably concerned about their futures. Yet, in cities around the world, healthcare workers, police, firemen, grocery store employees, and anyone else who must serve the public despite the virus are being applauded and recognized for their service. Governments and charitable organizations are rallying, attempting to help those most in need.


Individually, we’ve all had to deal with social distancing, isolation, and the psychological effects of fear and uncertainty. Some of us have had to deal with actual COVID-19 infections, the resulting sickness, and even ultimate death among our family, friends, and colleagues. Reported domestic violence, suicide hotline activity, and alcohol consumption are all on the rise. And yet, there’s good news too. In practicing social distancing, people are demonstrating not only enlightened self-interest for their own health but also for the health of others. Families are spending time, sharing meals, doing homework, engaging in games and other activities together; doing things that previously they were too busy, over-scheduled, and over-committed to plan or engage in.

“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: some things are within our control and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can’t control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible.” – Epictetus, Greek Stoic Philosopher, 55-135 AD

Does anyone doubt that there will be a “new normal” when things settle down and we’re able, with some conditions, to leave our homes and go back to work? Most of us are not in a position to directly influence whether or not the country is better prepared for future pandemics, the economy can be restructured to grow again and eventually recover from this deep economic and financial crisis, or repair the many damages to the political and social fabric of our society. As the quote from Epictetus implies, we should focus on what we can control.

If history is any indication, we can’t count on the general population to make dramatic positive personal changes in the aftermath of the coronavirus. Instead, people will yearn for the way things were, the lifestyles they once had, and the comfortable, yet false, sense of security they once enjoyed. Many will revert back to habitual behavior, indulging in news, social media, idle conversation, and/or rumination about matters that they have no control over.

When people talk about the silver lining that has come out of this crisis, I hear a lot about how people are kinder, more considerate, more generous, and caring. People seem to suddenly feel genuinely grateful for good health, food, safe homes, family, friends, small comforts, and a civil society. Might we apply what we know about habits, routines, and human behavior to make gratitude an enduring and prominent part of the new normal?

“When we are challenged we do not rise to our expectations, we fall to our level of practice” – Archilochus, Greek Poet, 680-645 BC

In many ways, the coronavirus has been the ultimate stress test of our values and our intentions. Might we also remember what we’ve become acutely aware of during this unprecedented time? This crisis has revealed to many of us that our pre-coronavirus “goals” in life may not have reflected what matters most. If we are to survive and live happy, fulfilling, meaningful, and joyful lives, isn’t it imperative that we get our priorities straight and that we live with high intention?

“What many of us are discovering right now is that things we valued a few months ago don’t actually matter: our cars, the titles on our business cards, our privileged neighborhoods. Rather what’s coming to the forefront is a shift to figuring out what we find intrinsically rewarding…when a crisis hits, everything is put to the real test…The challenge then becomes wrapping our struggles into our values, because what we value only has meaning if it’s important when life is hard. To know if they have worth, your values need to help you move forward when you can barely crawl and the obstacles in your way seem insurmountable.” – Shane Parrish, Farnam Street blog

We named our process the Universal Framework because we’ve found, regardless of specific methods and circumstances, that all effective strategies and plans follow a similar pattern of discovering and illuminating what matters most, thinking about and designing actions to improve situations and circumstances, implementing and executing on plans and strategies, and, importantly, overseeing results, monitoring and adapting to new situations and circumstances (what we call stewardship). In our experience, where people often fall short despite their best intentions is being accountable for execution, ongoing monitoring, and adaptation. Thus, throughout this ongoing process, in addition to our roles as advisors, planners, and collaborators, we see ourselves as accountability partners with our clients and co-collaborators. We think it’s a win-win.


In the “new normal”, rigid, long-term planning and plans will be impractical and likely sub-optimal; too much will remain unknown and unknowable. It behooves us all to be flexible, agile, and adaptable in our thinking and actions. Despite the volatility, uncertainty, complexity, and ambiguity ahead, we have the opportunity to not only shift the way we think about wealth and our priorities but also to rebuild and reorganize our lives around our values; to walk our talk about money, wealth, and what truly matters to us individually, as families, and collectively as a civilized society. And make no mistake about this; what we decide and do will matter. We’re in this together.

Filed Under: New Normal Tagged With: Collaboration, Gratitude, Stewardship, Universal Framework

What Really is Estate Planning? Part 2

February 18, 2020 by Avi Kantor

Last month, I discussed how traditional estate planning focuses on wills, trusts, and other legal, tax, and financial structures. I emphasized that such an approach has been largely unsuccessful in sustaining multi-generational wealth. I proposed that if we “Put People First”, we might better sustain wealth and help people live more happy, fulfilled, meaningful, and joyous lives.

So, how might we put people first? We’ve developed what we call a “Universal Framework”. The framework breaks planning down into four phases – Discovering, Designing, Implementing, and Stewarding. Our framework keeps people top-of-mind as we engage in ANY planning process and implement financial and legal structures. By keeping people top-of-mind during each planning phase, we believe that planning becomes more relevant and ultimately more successful. Why? Traditional estate planning often focuses on minimizing taxes by dividing money among beneficiaries and/or deferring the payment of taxes. What winds up happening is that assets get distributed to unprepared beneficiaries, only to see those assets dissipated because beneficiaries weren’t engaged in the long-term planning and strategy of the family. In other words, the plans don’t involve the beneficiaries; they are done to them. We believe that what’s missing is the participation and involvement of all family members – in other words, the people.

What might we do differently? We begin by focusing on each individual’s True Wealth – that which is most essential for each family member. Each individual family member’s clarity and awareness about their values and priorities and their vision of the future prepares them to contribute to the overall planning, implementation, and stewarding of a family’s assets.

Much like a successful sports team or a high-performing orchestra, family members need processes and structure in order to perform at their best as an organization or enterprise. Everyone participates and contributes, even if their contribution is relatively small. This notion of a “Family Enterprise” seeks to optimize the way a family functions together; that is, the enterprise seeks to optimize the people, process, and structure of the family.

To carry the metaphor of a sports team or orchestra one step further, we (The Certior Group) function much like a “conductor” or “general manager”, maintaining the flow and momentum of the planning process. We adapt our Universal Framework to collaborate with other professionals. We then focus our endeavors on keeping people top of mind as we co-create, curate, and optimize products and services for the benefit of our client families. Our role is to maintain collective focus on long-term individual and multi-generational family happiness, fulfillment, meaning, and joy. It’s our notion of what “Stewardship” is all about.

Filed Under: Collaboration, Estate Planning, Family Enterprise Tagged With: Collaboration, Estate Planning, People First, Stewardship

What Will The Future of Family Stewardship Be?

October 1, 2018 by Avi Kantor

In the late 20th century, the United States Army War College created the acronym VUCA to describe the conditions that would exist after the disintegration of the Soviet Union. The acronym stands for volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous. The term has caught on with the military and, especially, in business, describing the general conditions that exist today in nearly every aspect of our daily lives: technology, culture, politics, economics, etc. Massive changes, simultaneous opportunities for greater abundance as well as disruption of our way of life, are the order of the day.

As science and technology inexorably advance, there may soon come a day when sophisticated tax, legal, accounting, financial, and other technical information and strategies will be widely available on demand to the general public at an affordable price. We will also face unprecedented disruptions in our traditional patterns of work, career development, family dynamics, aging, and retirement.[1] Perhaps these trends will eventually lead to a world where artificial intelligence, “big data”, and algorithms know us so well that our most sophisticated multi-generational planning is automated and personalized.[2]

With the inexorable advance of technology and its dominance in our everyday lives, what will the future of family stewardship planning be?

Charles H. Green, the author of the book “The Trusted Advisor” says:

“People rarely give over their trust to institutions; really, they trust other people…While companies are often described as credible and reliable…it’s really the people within the companies that make those companies what they are.”

The Trusted Advisor

In a rapidly changing VUCA world, we do our best to foster participation and engagement in experiences where people are in conversations with other people. We view our role as guiding people down the path of discovery through these experiences and conversations. The practice of Gratitude especially has, in our experience, transformed people’s experience of wealth and their experiences of other family members, making them more aware of their common bonds and shared values.

Stewardship involves building and developing leadership in future generations and committing to ethical excellence in the way we lead our lives and families. Stewardship and family leadership also involves intentionally being aware of and nurturing sustainable family culture (the traditions, rituals, ceremonies, and unspoken ways that families do things, interact, as well as the expectations that go with these activities). Family culture is often a missing element in trust and estate planning, especially when governance and structure are the primary emphasis in the planning process. We view this as our opportunity to make a difference in the effectiveness of the planning process, regardless of the state of the world, technology, or existing relationships with other advisors.

[1] “Reimagining Maturity”, Ken Dychtwald, American Society on Aging Annual Conference, General Session Keynote address, March 23, 2015.

[2] Peter Diamandis and Ray Kurzweil, Abundance 360, Livestream, September 14, 2018. During this video broadcast Kurzweil and Diamandis speculated that such capabilities might become widely available within the next 10 to 15 years because of what Kurzweil calls “the law of accelerating returns”.

Filed Under: Family Office Tagged With: Family Culture, Stewardship, Trust, VUCA

Navigating Your Family to a Prosperous Future

May 28, 2018 by Avi Kantor

​At a recent conference, a prominent East Coast trust and estate attorney stated that he has mixed feelings about family meetings. He went on to explain that in his experience, attempts to conduct productive family meetings often dissolve​ ​into acrimony and bitter attempts by older, more powerful family members to dictate the thoughts and actions of the rest of the family.

The conversation then shifted to Family Mission Statements and “Constitutions” – that is, documents that layout ideal visions, sets of core values, and ironclad rules for the family to follow at the risk of dire consequences for non-compliance. Fortuitously, this discussion gave ​David Quinn and me​ a​n opportunity​ to shift the focus of the ​conference​ from external ways to control the future behavior of family members to more intrinsic ways that families might navigate towards a prosperous and sustainable future.

If you’ve participated in any of our events, you ​know ​that we emphasize gratitude, “True Wealth (a holistic view of wealth and well-being), and family leadership as the primary ​driver​s for people as they seek happiness, fulfillment, and meaning for themselves and their families. A family culture that lives gratitude, “True Wealth”, and leadership, we believe, gives a family the best chance of thriving for multiple generations. As the Certior Group, our most exciting opportunity is to accelerate progress of all of our stakeholders in all of these areas through experiential learning and the support of the Wealth and Well-being community we’re building.

Family meetings are ​part – but not the only ​part – of building​ family culture. ​These meetings and the estate and trust planning process often ​overlook the powerful role that intentional leadership and the thoughtful building of an optimal family culture play in sustaining a family.​ Elevating family culture is what we hope to cultivate through our community-building efforts, our experiential learning events, as well the work we do with our clients.​ ​

Building ​family culture ​is an art. Guiding and mentoring​ family members​ as they become leaders can be challenging. That’s why I’m so excited about about the experiences and the learning that we’ll share in the future and the Certior community that’s emerging here in Jackson.

Filed Under: True Wealth Tagged With: Family, Stewardship, True Wealth

How to Raise More Grateful Children

April 1, 2018 by Avi Kantor

The Wall Street Journal recently published an article “How to Raise More Grateful Children”. The subtitle states: “A sense of entitlement is a big problem among young people today, but it’s possible to teach gratitude”. This last idea is what we are doing with our Certior Group community.

Wall St. Journal Article: “How to Raise More Grateful Children”

Much of what I’ve learned about Gratitude has come from personal experience. When I look back, every personal crisis I’ve had has ultimately led to me to Gratitude. Whether it’s a serious illness, or a major setback in business or an unexpected accident, I now see the positives in those events and feel grateful for what I’ve learned from them. I’ve learned that adversity can be a great teacher, if you pay attention to the lessons. It wasn’t always that way.

I’ve learned a lot about Gratitude from my colleagues and friends at Empowered Wealth. Many have had personal or family health issues. We have all learned to appreciate and not take good health for granted. We’ve all learned the value of having family members who get along and care about each other. I think we share the value of friendship and being part of a community where we feel like we belong. It’s one of the reasons why I love living here in Jackson.

Most of all, my experiences have taught me the value of Gratitude is a lifestyle, a practice that starts with self-respect and respect for others, grows into appreciation for the many blessings we all have, and inspires the spirit of generosity that gives fulfillment and meaning to the way we live our lives.

Filed Under: True Wealth Tagged With: Empowered Wealth, Family, Gratitude, Stewardship

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