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The Value of Gratitude

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The Wall Street Journal recently published an article “How to Raise More Grateful Children”. The subtitle states: “A sense of entitlement is a big problem among young people today, but it’s possible to teach gratitude”. This last idea is what we are doing with our Certior Group community.

How to Raise More Grateful Children

Much of what I’ve learned about Gratitude has come from personal experience. When I look back, every personal crisis I’ve had has ultimately led to me to Gratitude. Whether it’s a serious illness, or a major setback in business or an unexpected accident, I now see the positives in those events and feel grateful for what I’ve learned from them. I’ve learned that adversity can be a great teacher, if you pay attention to the lessons. It wasn’t always that way.

I’ve learned a lot about Gratitude from my colleagues and friends at Empowered Wealth. Many have had personal or family health issues. We have all learned to appreciate and not take good health for granted. We’ve all learned the value of having family members who get along and care about each other. I think we share the value of friendship and being part of a community where we feel like we belong. It’s one of the reasons why I love living here in Jackson.

Most of all, my experiences have taught me the value of Gratitude is a lifestyle, a practice that starts with self-respect and respect for others, grows into appreciation for the many blessings we all have, and inspires the spirit of generosity that gives fulfillment and meaning to the way we live our lives.

Leaving an Inheritance of True Wealth

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One of the statistics that we often cite is that 97% of family wealth is lost by the 4th generation. This statistic has its genesis in a study conducted many years ago by the Family Firm Institute. Another organization The Williams Group has conducted a 20 year study that cites 70% as the percentage of family wealth that is dissipated over three generations.

How to Leave an Inheritance Without Causing Grief

One of the reasons we founded the Certior Group on the principles of Empowered Wealth was to address some of the issues cited in this article. As the title suggests, the article focuses on leaving an inheritance. It references research done by Boston College that indicates that “participants with children worried less about making more money and impacting the world through philanthropy than ‘to be a good parent’.”

As a parent with young children, this phrase resonates with me. The paradox and challenge for me – as I’ve observed it is for many – is that “leaving an inheritance” is a somewhat distant, abstract idea. The task that we’re contemplating is to clearly, realistically visualize the future and begin to set the conditions now that will give our children and future generations of our family the greatest likelihood of succeeding and thriving. This is no different than the responsibilities and opportunities our ancestors faced. What’s different about today is that technological, demographic, economic, social, and political forces are accelerating change in more volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous ways than ever before.

I commend the Williams Group for identifying “meaningful, productive and honest conversations about the impact of money and the purpose of the wealth”; heirs “relationship to wealth”; and “having a shared understanding of the purpose of the wealth” as guidelines for how to be “good parents” when it comes to inheritances. However, here’s where the principles of Empowered Wealth have informed our work; there’s more to being a “good parent”.

We are very committed to empowering leaders in families who, in turn, will empower family members (and others) to live in Gratitude and to build their futures around what they value most.

Avi Kantor

Sustaining Financial Wealth Over More Than 3 Generations

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Much of our work focuses on the opportunities and challenges of first generation wealth creators and their immediate descendants. One of the sayings that’s inspired our work is the warning “shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in 3 generations”; that is, wealth does not survive beyond 3 generations.

The article below offers a glimpse into how the Rockefeller family has sustained its wealth beyond three generations.

The Rockefellers vs. the Company That Made Them The Rockefellers

The article is instructive because it points out some of the long-term strategies and obstacles for families who aspire to sustain their financial wealth over more than 3 generations. These include:

The growing number of the extended family members over multiple generations.

The basic math suggests that at some point, unless there’s another large influx of money from investments or new ventures, the demands for withdrawals will exceed the growth of the underlying financial assets. In anticipation of this eventuality, we take the position that a family culture that emphasizes:

  1. The long-term greater good of the family
  2. Gratitude (and avoiding greed, over-consumption, and entitlement)
  3. Elevates prudent risk-taking and entrepreneurism is something to strive for.

The ability to continue to engage in dialogue and to develop strategies as an extended family, especially the ability to foster inter-generational collaboration.

As a family grows in numbers, so too does the diversity of ideologies and opinions of family members. In the article, the banter between the Federal Judge and the Exxon attorney about whether the Rockefeller initiative against Exxon is “disturbing” (as the Exxon attorney states) or “ironic” (as the judge viewed it), highlights the generational differences that the Rockefeller family has dealt with. Yet the Rockefeller family has apparently managed to maintain a civil discourse and family harmony, despite the activism of younger generations

The long shadow, the legacy – both positive and negative – of the wealth creators.

Like the Rockefellers, many families continue to hold their wealth in the stock of the original company that created the wealth. Whether or not this is or will be prudent in an increasingly volatile, unpredictable future is unknown. However, a wealth creator has the opportunity to prepare younger family members for the opportunities and responsibilities of great wealth. This may or may not include the freedom from retaining the stock of the original company and perhaps instilling an entrepreneurial mindset in the culture of the family.

Finally, the article hints at the power of a higher purpose, a noble cause, and the ability to wield influence through philanthropy, as well as business. I was struck by the quote attributed to John D. Rockfeller:

As a nation looking proudly to our past where it has been noble, and recognizing with humility our mistakes of extravagance, selfishness, and indifference, let us with faith in God, in ourselves, and in humanity, go forward courageously resolved to play our part in worthily building a better world.

Avi Kantor

The Curse and Blessing of Family Wealth

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Thayer Willis has a unique background to write about the psychological challenges of wealth. She was born into the founding family of the Georgia-Pacific Corporation, enjoying the privileges of extreme wealth and suffering some of the many tragedies that children of wealth experience. In her professional career, she has developed a counseling specialty working with wealthy families, especially wealth inheritors, on the “dark side of wealth”.

In this article, Thayer talks about this dark side, especially the focus on financial assets and the ingratitude that can dominate the thinking and lives of children born into extreme wealth.

Why Family Wealth is a Curse

Thayer also wrote a second article on the blessings of family wealth. Interestingly, this article has not been as widely read as the “Curse” article. Yet, in this article, she provides hope and advice on overcoming the “Curse”.

Why Family Wealth is a Blessing

One of the reasons we founded the Certior Group on the principles of Empowered Wealth was because of my own experiences seeing the positive impact Gratitude and True Wealth had within my own family and the families of the people we work with. Thayer Willis’ articles reinforce our vision that we can make a difference by helping individuals and families build a solid practice of Gratitude and focus on the things that really matter – like love, support, and making wise choices.

Sustaining True Wealth Over Multiple Generations

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According to the Family Business Institute…only 30% of family businesses survive into the second generation and 12% into the third. A mere 3% make it into the fourth and beyond

Many sources cite similar statistics, pointing to an extraordinarily high worldwide failure rate in wealth transitions (generally defined as wealth remaining under the control of the beneficiaries). This begs the question, “Why does this happen?” One of the pioneering thinkers on this issue, attorney, James E. Hughes, Jr., focused on the lack of structure and governance in families. The article below suggests that lack of inter-generational communication and collaboration have been the primary causes of wealth dissipating over three generations.

CNN Money Article: Squandering the Family Fortune…Why Rich Families Are Losing Their Money

Consider the many advisors that families employ. There are attorneys, accountants, consultants, psychologists, life coaches, and various financial advisors from wealth managers, to insurance agents, to financial and estate planners all of whom, presumably in good faith, attempt to help their client families protect, preserve, grow, and sustain their wealth for multiple generations. Despite the collective best efforts of all of these professionals, their net effectiveness has been no more than 10% over three generations. What if Apple sold you a product that failed 90% of the time? Would you buy it? Yet, that’s in effect what families are doing when they continue to use traditional methods to plan for their families’ futures..

We cannot solve problems with same level of thinking that created them

– Albert Einstein

Thinking at a new, different level about the challenges of transitioning wealth, does not mean that the best work of attorneys, accountants, and other professionals isn’t necessary. Families need governance guided by the work of skilled attorneys. They need excellent tax and estate planning, wealth management, business consulting, work on family dynamics, and life coaching. Families need teams of professional service providers. Yet, how might these teams of professionals do things differently, more effectively?

By now, many of you know that we’ve adopted a mindset of Gratitude, “True Wealth”, and Leadership as core beliefs to address the “shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in 3 generations” issue. It has been our experience that families must accept an attitude and a disciplined practice of Stewardship if we’re to sustain True Wealth over multiple generations. Our roles as advisors are to support our client families in this Stewardship undertaking. In other words, it’s to collaborate with our clients and each other in an endeavor that has historically challenged even the most intentional families. I will elaborate further on this topic of “collaboration” in future newsletters.

Avi Kantor

The CERTIOR Group, LLC

The Certior Group, LLC.

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